It’s OWL good

The end.

I wonder what my life would be like if I were an owl, I think I have the eyes for it. I want to do my research before I become one though.

So, are they bound by society’s expectations? Do they go to Church? Any kind of school? Flying school maybe? What about exams? Do they celebrate bank holidays? What about food, are there vegans amongst them? Do they look forward to the occasional dessert? Do they watch their calories? Or have to work out for that summer body? Do they have a curfew at home? Do they have mortgages? Are they thinking of the housing crisis or the stock market? Do they worry about elections? Do they write affirmations and have mood boards? Do they stand in long winding queues for the latest iPhone? What about Instagram and Facebook? Oh and profile pictures?!

What do they do for mindfulness, to deal with the daily stress? Do they meditate? Is that what they are doing as they perch on that branch, eerily staring into space? Do they chalk in weekly counselling sessions in their diary? Do they Netflix and chill?

Like all narcissistic humans, I assume they always think of us.

Do they think we are a hot mess and so full of ourselves? I mean was it not a human who once said that ‘Humans are the most intelligent of all animals’?’

In all fairness, we have contributed to this planet in myriad ways. Haven’t we changed the climate profile of this entire planet throughout our life here? Which other species, pray tell, have induced melting glaciers, frequent and intense droughts, frequent and intense floods, frequent and intense temperature changes, cities that are now more water than land, forests burning down. At least all the leaders of the world have arrived in their fossil fuel burning, planet-warming private jets and petrol-guzzling luxury cars, to discuss the climate crisis, and have now reached a consensus on how to save the planet. Not like a zoom conference would do for this annual performance.

If I was that owl, all I would see is the species that will be the end of me.

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